Tuesday, November 8, 2011
We took our 8th link down from our chain this evening, 7 more remain. My heart has been fluttering all day long for various reasons. I am so unbelievably pumped about brining our wonderful Russian gal home FOREVER!!! Yet, my heart is also anxious and nervous for my 3 here at home. I fought tears many times today.....thinking about tucking them in and hearing them say I love you to the moon and back and then arguing over who loves the most! What am I going to do while I am away from them? I literally feel the world caving in because part of me is ecstatic and the other is torn! I am in no way worried about the kiddos care while we are gone....my brother and sis in law are going to do an awesome job.........Nanny and Mimi will help as well. One of the main things I am going to focus on for the next month is that we have spent 8 years raising and getting to know Brooks, 7 years with Luke and 4 years with Campbell. They KNOW us, they communicate with us and they feel safe with us even when they aren't in our presence. Sweet A has never had that, so this time for us will mean beginning to learn each other, making eye contact, trying to communicate as best we can, hugging and kissing nonstop and building a firm foundation based on love and trust. We owe this time to her and while we will miss the other 3 TERRIBLY, they understand that she needs us. They are so strong, but have all admitted today that they will probably cry.....I will too, everyday, but they are resilient and I know that God will take care of them and give them the strength they need to get through those few weeks without us. I am already envisioning seeing their sweet blonde heads when we finally land on Dec. 14th, I am sure they will RUN to us and rightly so, we will RUN to them. Oh what a sweet homecoming it will be.....so much joy, my heart is FULL!